Last weekend I thought it would be nice to take my girlfriend shopping somewhere different, so considered Lakeside or Bluewater. I didn’t mind the drive as I enjoy driving on the motorway (one of the few times I can go faster than 30 MPH) but have only driven to Lakeside once by myself. As she hadn’t been to Bluewater, that was what we decided to do, as it would be nice to give her a new experience (well, two new experiences, as she wanted to do Yo Sushi! as well).
So, a quick look on Google maps that morning before we head of and it looks like a simple belt down the A12 towards London, hop on the M25, over the Dartford crossing then finally head towards Bluewater. Simple right?
Wrong!
Before the crossing, there were signs for Lakeside, so I assumed there would be signs for Bluewater as well onces we were over the bridge.
Wrong!
As I figured I may get lost carrying on the M25 (and I knew I had to come off it to get to Bluewater) I turned off at the first junction I could find, hoping to find a service station or lay-by to look up the directions on my smart phone.
Wrong turn!
Not only did this road not have a service station or any lay-bys, but there were no turn-off’s for about 10 minutes, sending us even further away from our destination. When there finally was a turning, it took us through some narrow (basically one car width) country roads, small towns and creepy looking middle of nowhere farms. It was something out of the film “Wrong Turn” but thankfully with better looking locals.
I pulled over (again, took a while to find a suitable safe place) and typed “Bluewater” into the map location. First of all, my phone is a Windows Phone 7, so has Bing maps included. It found Bluewater, but in the USA. Not really helpful.
[I have now used Bing maps on a computer and it does come up with Bluewater in the UK as a location, but this is a major bug on the phone map]
All was not lost, for I had another map installed…Google Maps! {enter heavenly music here}. It found Bluewater, in the UK! [hooray] it was able to map a route to it [yay] which took us through small towns and villages rather than a motorway [not so yay]. After driving through some very pretty towns, it decided to change our location from a road, to the middle of a field.
[Don't worry, I wasn't using the phone when driving, my GF was giving me directions]
After the phone had failed us; even when switching back to bing maps, using the postcode obtained via a web search; She suggested a strange new technology that, as a man, I was not familiar with.
Asking someone for directions! [Dun dun DUUUUUN]
We spotted a fire station doing a charity car wash (who better than a fireman to ask for directions) and I got her to ask him (I had my pride after all). The old boy was very helpful and told us to go take the road ahead, then right, then left, then through a town called Bean, and then we would be there. So we walked back to the car, turned around and set off. As we drove past, we waved us down.
“Did I say right then left? I meant left then right! Sorry.”
Thankfully his (new) directions got us there perfectly fine (even if we did take a minor turn by accident) and had a brilliant day buying way too many sweet naughty things (I am glad Krispy Kreme and Hotel Chocolat are not based in Colchester, my waistline would not cope).
Lesson learned?
Technology can get you lost, whilst local knowledge is more accurate, even with a mistake 
Why does this not surprise me Oli!
About time you invested in a sat nav, a half decent one only costs between £79-£99
Why would lakeside have signs for a rival shopping centre…
Here are some clues
Lakeside, Essex before the crossing
Bluewater, Kent after the crossing!